I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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