Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
