Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
