Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
