The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
