Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize