Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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