If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
