Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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