I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
