idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
