Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
