either way he was missing a nipple.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize