redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
