I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Is Oprah even human
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
