If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize