I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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