so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
