His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
