like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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