I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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