So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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