Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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