Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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