how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
