Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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