Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
