I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
