Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize