My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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