Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
The uberlube is also flammable
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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