I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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