i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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