Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Randomize
