i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Randomize
