i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
This baby is an asshole
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
MIDGETS
????
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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