the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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