I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
