he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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