I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Randomize
