Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
do herpes really smell.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize