i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
