I will die if light touches me.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
