i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
