When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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