Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize