Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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