'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
