she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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