i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
