I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize