Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
